It was so unreal

Seeing you so still

I felt myself kneel

Wishing it wasn't real...

I like you... And you know that, but still I can't do nothing to show you how I feel.. Because I get nervous everytime our eyes meet, our hands touch..

I feel like I'm dying when I see you because I feel the need to kiss you or hug you. And I question myself what will you think of me if I do that? Will you hate me or will you do the same to me?

You tend to kiss me when I least expect it, embrace and squeeze me against your body... I loved it everytime and still I was always fighting the urge to do the same to you...

I get insecure when I'm with you and I ended up overtinking everything..

I'm tense around you, fighting all the feelings and emotions that I have for you.. I'm the kind of fool who keeps every emotion to herself, regreting every moment when I restrict myself..

I want to be able to show you how I feel about you, because I'll always cherish you...

Ao longo da vida existem momentos que nos fazem pensar acerca do que deveriamos ter feito de maneira diferente...

Mas será que se tivessemos mudado as coisas iria adiantar de algo? Pois por muito que tomemos uma decisão hoje, haverá sempre um dia em nos iremos questionar se terá sido a escolha mais acertada a fazer... Criando assim um ciclo inquebrável de incertezas...
E inevitavelmente haverá momentos em que nos acabamos por habituar a certas decisões que fazemos, pois independentemente das vezes que nos mentalizamos que aquela escolha é a errada, acabamos sempre por a repetir inumeras vezes seguidas... Significará que somos masoquistas desde nascimento? Ou desenvolvemos a capacidade de cometer os mesmos erros vezes sem conta?

Amizade

Amizade...
Algo comum para aqueles que não a expriênciaram verdadeiramente...
Existem inúmeros tipos de amizade, mas nem todas elas podem ser consideradas verdadeiras.
Eu já fui capaz de viver algumas delas, umas que deixaram ferida, mas para essas há sempre cura, pois existem outras que nos permite seguir em frente enfrentando as nossas feridas fazendo-as cicratizar...
Recentemente encontrei a verdadeira amizade... Como sei que é verdadeira? Essa pergunta é muito fácil de responder bastam quatro palavras: confiança, aceitação, respeito e orgulho.
A junção destas quatro palavras faz uma amizade ser verdadeira, pois aí nós conhecemos as pessoas como ninguém, podemos partilhar opiniões iguais ou diferentes que sempre seremos respeitados por ela sem nunhum tipo de discriminação mas sim aceitação, aprendendo assim a aceitar as diferenças que temos; temos de aprender a confiar pois dessa maneira nos sentimos seguros com essas pessoas, pois se eles não confiam em nós quem o faria? E finalmente orgulho, pois sem ele não seriamos capazes de nos manter unidos por tanto tempo. Pois com ele temos todas as outras palavras juntas e faz-nos querer continuar com essas pessoas pois nos orgulhamos disso..

Se foste um daqueles que não chegou a encontrar estas palavras numa amizade continua a tentar, pois não há nada melhor que uma amizade em que podemos ser nós mesmo sem nenhum tipo de conflito...
Obrigada àqueles que ainda me acompanham e obrigada por todos os momentos que passamos juntos!
Amo-vos Nuno Jardim e Carlos Moita <3

 Everyday I feel like I don't belong here, I always feel alone in my little world surronded by unknown people..
Also I don't know how to express my feelings to those I really care about... Sometimes I imagine myself all alone envying the others who manage to find true love...

I wish I could find someone who would share moments with me and who could save my broken soul from this world I'm stucked in...

Inner Feelings

There are inumerous types of people... I guess I'm the ignorant type. I've been told a thousands times to be calm, but I never managed to do it. And because of that in the end I was always the one suffering.
Ever since I can recall I've been the most unlucky girl in the world.
Because of my short temper I always ended up in fights.. In every single fight for some unknown reason I was the only one being punished, the hard kind of punishment, I stand it for a very long time keeping all this anger deep inside my heart..
With the many times being told to calm myself down I closed myself in my own world. I barely speak to people because if I talk to them they always misunderstand my words.. I'm shy everytime I'm around a boy because I don't know how to behave next to them.. I can't relax around people I can only be myself around animals because in some way I understand them.
Because I'm also afraid of being left alone. I don't make friends that easily, so I care to much about those I manage to have...
The thing I fear the most is being betrayed by someone of my friends, because if that happens I would personaly break them appart with my bare hands..

The Real Me?

I hate when people act like they know the real me... How can they possibly know who I am, if I myself don't quiet know that... But what really pisses me off is when I finaly get to know me, the people around me start saying stuff like 'you're not the same person I used to know, where is she?' but just for your information that's the real me the one I've been looking for..
So just quit it! Stop accting like you fuckin' know me!

Prisoner...

When I was all by myself, while my friends were on the educational fisic class. My mind was only filled with you… So I wrote something for you, even if I don’t have the courage enough to give it to you…
So here it goes my letter to you:

“In this world are so many words to say, but when I see you walking on my direction, the most simple words like Good Morning are like the most dificult for me to say to you… My heart wants tell you how he feels but, my brain don’t allow it. I guess it’s because he thinks my heart will blow out my chest from the answer for his poor feelings… Who can tell my rationality that she don’t have reasons to fear your answer?

Will I have to give up my rationality, for my heart be happy? Or will I have to suffer the consequences of my irrational act?

But if just for a moment I could have the courage, to let my heart discuss with you the feelings that grown on him, he will be more capable to be confortable… Without that sharp sword pointed on him…

But from the courage that I will gain, I sould also gain some strength… With it I will be more confident, even with the answer you would give to my heart… Cause I can’t guarantee that my heart will not be knocked out with your negative answer…

After all this thoughts will I be ready to give up both, my heart and rationality to you? Or shut my thoughts and regretting my weak brain?

So after all this are you able to break all the shields that my brain will make to protect my poor and dependent heart?

Please, save him from this eternal prision!…”

Well that’s it.

Carlos Moita

Carlos

O Melhor Amigo que qualquer pessoa possa ter =3
Ainda bem que nos conhecemos, não me imagino a viver sem ele :P
Juntos Para Todo O Sempre!!! *.*

Love Ya!

What' Wrong With Me?

I don't really know how to talk to people...
And I have a guy in my class that makes my heart go wild... But I don't really know how to say to him what I feel for him...
I don't really know how to express myself... Because I'm a very shy person, so I don't know how to interact with the others... I only can talk with my best friends... So I don't know I to make friends...
I have all my best friends because they were the first ones to interact with me... And I'm glad for that ^^


But I guess I'm afraid of him getting  to know my feelings...
I don't know anything about being in Love... Why do we love if we may suffer for that selfish desire of ours?
But we don't really care, do we? Because if we care, we would be all alone on all the road of life...
But am I afraid of this selfish desire?
I'm so insecure about my way of feeling things... I don't know how to express my own feelings, because of that I try to act like I know...

So how can I explain my heart getting rebel all of sudden just by looking at him, beating so fast that makes my ears burn? Why do I feel speechless just by standing next to him? Why do my heart burns when he smile? And why does my body don't move just by meeting his eyes?

Is this what other people call "Love"?
How can I express myself?
If you figure it out please help me saying the most dificult words for me...

"I Love You"

Why do I feel so lonely now? Is it that because I'm stupid?

Well because I'm such a coward me and my best friend, we haven't talked yet.
I really want to talk to him... But I don't know what I should say to him...
Because of this fear that I fell, maybe our friendship is not going to be the same again...
But I just wanted him to know that I'm really sorry for all the things that I have done, and even said...
I really hope that he could forgive me...
I don't know how to speak to people about my own feelings... That's because I'm always being misunderstood, cause I don't know much about my own feelings...
I don't know how is to feel love, all I know it that with him I feel really good...
And I don't wanna miss all the great moments that I have passed with him...
I don't want him to be taken away from me, even if I know that he would never be taken away....
But I really have this need to protect him... For being hurt by someone... Because he's like my younger brother, even if he's the oldest... But I guess I have to let him free now...
Because I really want to spend all my time with him again... I want that he can feel safe with me...

So for now on can I be your shield? Just for you to feel, how much I need your friendship...
Can you give one more chance Senpai?
Please, I swear that I'll never fight with you again... Even if I think I'm totally right...

So.. What do you say?
Would you like to be my best friend again?
With no more fights... Just the old friendship that we built?